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Twisted Fates Page 11
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“It won’t take over!” I shouted. I scrambled from the bed, trembling with fear. It was then that I noticed a suitcase sitting in the closet.
Heart in my throat, I ventured inside. The suitcase opened with a click. Tears stung the backs of my eyelids when I saw my clothing in the suitcase. Each piece had been neatly folded before being placed with care inside. A mesh compartment held an assortment of toiletries. He wanted me to leave. He no longer wanted me. Gods! I should have seen this coming.
The suitcase clicked closed. I carried it in one hand, stopping only to shove my feet into a pair of sandals. Kade turned when I walked to the door.
“Where are you going, Mia?”
Laughter nearly erupted at his words. His voice was tinged with concern. Why be concerned now when the mate you want gone is leaving? Instead, I said the words I knew he wanted to hear. “You want me to go. My suitcase is already packed. After everything…”
“This can wait until tomorrow,” he muttered, eyes gazing anywhere, but at me.
“It’s true, then. You want me to leave?” I turned to face the door, a hand holding the doorknob that felt like ice. “I’ll give you the space you need. I realize I am no longer the slender, svelte Omega who can easily satisfy your needs. There are others, I’m certain, that can give you what you want.”
Kade did not speak when the door opened. I slammed it behind me. Standing in the hall for a moment gave me time to collect myself. There was no need to waste time trying to convince him of anything. Kade would believe what he wished to believe in much the same way that he did what he always wanted to do.
Berenger was awake when I dropped by the medical bay. He glanced up when I walked in.
“Mia. I didn’t expect to see you this late at night,” he said. “Have a seat.”
“I don’t have a lot of time, Berenger. I need to go to the settlement. There’s an empty cottage there if I’m not mistaken. Will you take me?” My voice trembled as I spoke. It took every bit of strength to hold back the tsunami of tears waiting to spill.
Berenger leapt to his feet. His eyes flashed. Both hands curled into fists as he spoke. “What the hell is going on? Surely Kade isn’t sending you away.”
“I’m too tired to talk about this any further. Take me to the settlement. I’ll decide what I want to do tomorrow.”
Berenger did not argue with me. He commandeered a transport for the trip to the settlement. We remained silent, even after he ensured to equip the cottage with everything I needed. He visited the settlement’s leader to inform him I would be staying in the village.
“Call me if you need anything, Mia. I worry that you might deliver early. The baby is larger than normal.” He handed me a mini-COMM unit that resembled a watch in many ways. “That is programmed to access my COMM unit in the medical bay. Day, or night, you call for me. If you experience contractions, bleeding, or anything that’s off.”
“Thank you, Berenger. I’ll keep it with me, at all times.” The strap fit around my wrist. Berenger fastened it before our conversation continued.
“I don’t know what the hell is going on, but I intend on finding out,” he muttered. “Kade tends to get screwed up in the head a few times a year. It doesn’t last long. Be patient with him.”
My friend offered a hug. I accepted, desperate to feel that someone accepted and cared for me. At least I knew Berenger genuinely cared. “I owe him nothing. Goodnight, Berenger.”
The closing door released the floodgate of emotion. I collapsed on the floor where I huddled the remainder of the night. Near dawn, I fell into a restless, uneasy sleep, tormented with thoughts of why I was not enough for Kade to fight harder.
*****
I managed to find my niche in the village community within a few weeks. The residents accepted me without question. They treated me with respect. A few came calling to invite me to dinner with their families. A few of the older women in the village took me under their wing. We spent many enjoyable hours drinking tea while they taught me to knit and sew.
This morning’s walk was never intended for social interaction. I used it to escape the horrible dreams that kept me awake last night. But as they often did, a villager intercepted me.
“It’s an honor to have our queen live among us.” The old woman’s comment brought my head up. She gazed at me with kind blue eyes.
“I’m no longer your queen.” The admission brought a rift of pain. I pushed it away, my hand going to the ever-burgeoning belly where a series of kicks leaves me breathless. The ache in my lower back intensified. I rubbed the area with one hand, to no avail. I could breathe easier after the baby dropped lower in the womb. But, then again, the urgency to empty my bladder worsened. Tit for tat.
“You’ll always be the people’s queen,” she assured me.
“Thank you. I must go. I’m expecting a visitor.” Any excuse was better than none to end a conversation reminding me of what I once was, where I once lived with the love of my life. The old woman waved as I walked away.
The twinge of a false contraction nearly brought me up short as I began walking. Berenger’s last exam included an overview of things to expect in the last weeks of pregnancy. My ankles have started to swell. Many days, it was impossible to wear more than a pair of sandals. Walking barefooted was the easiest for me. I found it difficult to remain in one position for long periods of time. I was off balance, belly huge with Kade’s offspring.
A month passed since the night Kade took it upon himself to crush my heart. The tendril remained silent that entire time. I had accepted my place in the settlement, as much as the people had accepted me. It would be a good place to raise my son.
I waddled along the path toward the cottage I called home. The man who conducted the marriage ceremony all those months ago stood on the porch. He turned when I called out. I could see that he carried the ledger beneath one arm.
“Thank you for coming on such short notice. Would you like to come in? I can make tea.”
“I would enjoy that. My name is Herald. We were never properly introduced,” he murmured.
The tea kettle didn’t take long to whistle. I carried a tray with two cups of tea, and some cookies, into the living room. Herald sipped the tea before taking a cookie. This was a difficult moment for him. I could see it reflected in his eyes.
“I hope you don’t mind coming here. I realize these matters should be handled at the Garrison, or in your office. Were you ever assigned to an office?” The mug’s warmth eased the tension in my fingers. Not once since coming to Barkjour did I think I would find myself alone a few weeks from giving birth.
“No office, yet,” Herald sighed, then continued. “I must admit, I hoped our people could avoid the casual regard for marriage our ancestors exhibited. Not that I’m saying this situation is casual in any way.” He coughed, tugged the collar of his shirt with a finger, and smiled faintly. It was little more than a lifting of the corners of his mouth that disappeared a second later.
“Your king has made it apparent he no longer wants me as his wife. I will not be entangled with someone who abhors my presence. I would like to get this over with.” The words came out much easier than I expected them to. I had rehearsed this moment for days in front of a mirror. Each and every time before now I had dissolved into tears.
Herald opened the ledger to the first page. My eyes misted over to see our declaration of marriage.
“Write your intent to dissolve the marriage, sign, and date. I will present this to our king as soon as I return to the Garrison. It takes both parties, agreeing. An official decree will be entered. Your marriage will end when I sign the decree, and enter it in the ledger of divorces.” Herald stood up, took a sip of tea, and grimaced.
“What’s wrong?”
“I fear this will not end well,” he admitted.
Herald stood there, shifting his weight from one foot, to the other, as if I would change my mind. His nervousness was evident. I would not change my mind, not after all this time.
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“Divorce, and marriage, are a part of Barkjour’s charter. The people wanted it this way,” I assured him. “It is your duty to follow through.” I escorted Herald to the door. My assurances seemed to fall on deaf ears. He frowned, and bowed, before leaving.
I settled into a rocking chair to crochet a blanket for the baby. Another twinge tightened my belly. It faded, allowing my thoughts to move on to the task at hand. One of the settlement’s Betas, with a talent for hand-crafted goods, taught me how to crochet. She gave me a handwritten pattern for the blanket. An odd desperation to ready things for the baby’s arrival began to grow over the past few days. My urge to build nests incessantly, especially at night, has grown, as well. Working on the blanket eases those urges.
Less than an hour passed after Herald’s departure when a faint bellowing roar echoed in the distance. A group of people ran past the cottage toward the direction of the sound. The roar came again, much closer, now. The group of people who ran toward the noise, now ran past the cottage—away from the noise.
The tendril sprang to life at that instant. Kade’s rage, and fear, pulsed through the tendril. The floors, and walls of the cottage, vibrated with the pounding of heavy footsteps that drew closer. The roar came, again. This time, it was less than fifty feet from the cottage.
“Where is she?” Kade shouted.
He was here. Gods help me, he was furious. I fought back the terror. No. He would not make demands of me after pushing me away with no warning.
The first pounding blow on the door rattled the windows. I chose to ignore it. Moments later, a half dozen more blows landed on the door. I folded the blanket before tucking it into the basket by the rocking chair.
“Open the door, Mia!” I did not need to see Kade to know he was furious. I knew that much from the tone of his voice.
Faltering steps carried me to the door. My hand came to rest on its smooth wooden surface.
“I don’t owe you anything.” The calm in my voice was in stark contrast to the swirling cauldron of emotions in my heart.
“Open the door,” he growled. “We need to talk, now.”
The demand meant nothing to me. At one time, I would have conceded anything to Kade. But now? I would give him nothing. The heart that once adored him shriveled and died over the past weeks.
“The time for talking was a month ago when you sent me away with a coward’s excuse for an explanation.” My voice trembled with emotion. The truth did little to calm me.
The door trembled as another blow landed on its exterior. “You send Herald to deliver your message? Is that not a coward’s ploy?”
How dare he? He dared speak of my cowardice yet denied his own?
“You sent me away. You have made no attempt to contact me, your supposed beloved mate, within months of giving birth. Once again, you failed me. I will not be foolish enough to accept a liar’s word, again. I want a divorce. I will find a mate who truly cares for me.”
Kade roared at the same instant as a flurry of blows on the door. “You are my mate. My wife. Mother of my unborn son. I will destroy anyone who dares touch you!”
Everyone has a breaking point. I had reached mine. The suddenly opened door made Kade step back. We faced off like predators fighting over prey.
The sudden kick from the child in my womb brought a gasp. It was as if the child knew his father stood just outside the door. Any other person would have shuddered to face Kade in this way. The savage warlord king of Barkjour Isle stood before me, in all his fearsome glory. Thoughts of who I faced failed to suppress my words.
“Don’t pretend to care. You gave up the right to have an opinion about anything I do when you pulled away, refused to discuss the problem, and let me walk away. You were the one who begged me to help you learn how to be a better mate. You should be pleased I failed so miserably. You now have your freedom from a mate you cannot stand to hold, or comfort in her time of need.” I turned with the intention of entering the cottage only to feel Kade’s hand on my shoulder.
“I’m sorry for hurting you, Mia.” He moved closer, the heat of his body searing mine. “Don’t give up on me.”
Why should I bother? Kade gave up on us weeks ago. I bit back the sob that threatened. Tears filled my eyes, without warning. A hand went automatically to the ache in my lower back that grew worse with standing.
“You are upset.” Kade’s breath caressed my face as his face moved closer. “Let me come in, Mia. I only wish to help.”
“The time for helping was weeks ago, Kade.” My resolve evaporated slowly but surely. Another twinge tightened across my belly. The contraction failed to concern me.
Just the other day I called Berenger after false labor continued for over an hour. He assured me this was a normal part of pregnancy.
“I’ve had to prepare for the baby’s birth on my own. You’ve been off doing whatever it is that kings do. No doubt, you have a harem of willing Betas to service your needs.” Bitterness tinged my response.
His fingers bit into my shoulder. None too gently, he forced me to turn, and face him. The heat, and anger reflected in his eyes, told me all I needed to know. “There has been no one since you left. There will be no one other than you.”
Kade took a step closer. I backed up in response. He took another step, as did I. To my horror, I realized my mistake. The door closed behind Kade. He leaned against it, a lazy grin spreading across his face. He bobbed his head toward the rocking chair, and basket containing the blanket.
“You are making things for our son. It pleases me to see this.” The boyish grin that weakened my resolve all those months ago appeared once again on his face. Kade knew exactly what he was doing.
“Why are you doing this? First you say you can’t be around me because you fear you’ll hurt me. Then, you come here, and open those old wounds. That hurts more than you will ever know, Kade. You don’t want me.” My voice rose to a shriek. My hands gesticulated wildly as I spoke.
“I am no longer afraid I will hurt you, or our child,” he announced. “It has taken this long for me to realize I can suppress my feral nature.”
Silence, and petitions for divorce, were the only things that seemed to get Kade’s attention. The petition for divorce brought him here. My heart hovered on the brink of asking him to take me with him to the Garrison. My brain demanded I follow through with the divorce. A realization came that Kade would never give me a divorce. I was trapped.
Instead of standing there arguing, or allowing him to see me cry, I walked into the kitchen. Kade followed as I knew he would. I filled the teapot, and set about the task of making tea. My hands trembled as I waited for the pot to whistle. Another twinge forced me to catch my breath. The silence did its job. It forced Kade to speak.
“You know I will never sign a decree of divorce. You are my mate. You must return to the Garrison with me.”
“I will stay here where I am welcome.” Steam swirled in the air moments before the pot whistled. I took it from the stove, poured water into two mugs, and handed Kade a mug.
His fingers tightened imperceptibly around the steaming cup. “You wish me to court you, to prove my intentions are honorable?”
I nearly laughed at the somber expression reflected on Kade’s face. Memories of the emotional pain, and self-doubt I had experienced since that night reared their heads. It reminded me why this moment contained zero humor.
“I wish you would drink your tea, stop talking, and then leave me alone.” I needed silence more than ever before. Kade was determined that I hear him.
“I will never leave you alone, Mia. You are my mate. I love you. I made a horrible mistake. Forgive me.”
I watched his lips moved as he spoke. Another strong contraction took my breath. I found it difficult to concentrate on Kade. My fingers gripped the table’s edge. Slow, focused breaths eased me through the moment. Only then did I realize Kade was standing at my side.
“Is something wrong, Mia?”
His voice was soft, seductiv
e. Its hypnotic baritone drew me in. I turned toward him, my hand settling on his chest. My face tilted upward of its own accord. Kade held my gaze. The back of his hand caressed my cheek. We stood like that until another contraction forced me to cry out. I bent over the table, grasped its edge, and breathed.
“How long have you been having contractions?” he muttered.
I knew what he was up to. Fake concern. I stared at him, eyes wide, heart pounding in my chest. I professed a lie. “It’s just a backache. Berenger says it’s perfectly normal the last few months.”
Chapter 12
Kade
My decision to send Mia away was born of fear. Baron Michaels’s revelation that One World had been destroyed revived memories of my past. Memories of the Omegas murdered by my hand. Memories of the crimson haze clouding my vision before my teeth ripped Mia’s flesh not once, but twice, mutilating her in the heat of feral rutting madness. Of my callous disregard for her after learning of Gabel’s abuse while I went in search of my brothers.
Too many instances of my inability to provide what my mate needed.
I failed her more than I cared to admit. The reality bit deep, dug its claws in, made me think distance was the only solution.
Foolish. I most certainly was that. I doubted I could ever learn how to be the mate Mia needed. My heart demanded I try. My brain dared me to endanger her, or our child. And, like a fool, I allowed her to leave without even trying.
Locking myself away, sleeping in the study--none of it made that night easier. In the days, and weeks after she left, I felt more alone than ever before. Not a night passed that I did not yearn for her scent, her warmth. I missed everything about Mia.
A fitful night of sleep left me ill-tempered. And then Herald came calling, knocking, and entering my study, without waiting for permission. He presented the ledger with Mia’s written request for dissolution of our marriage before I had the opportunity to ask the reason for his unexpected visit. He ran, and rightfully so. I ripped the ledger in half before heading for the road leading to the settlement.